How was your Easter?
“ Fabulous. We took some days out, watched lambs in the Spring sunshine, the children had fun and we all ate too much chocolate.”
“ Miserable. Things are impossible at home. We don’t talk except to argue, and now the rows are happening in front of the children. Little Jo is wetting the bed again and Sophie is very tearful. We couldn’t go out because we’ve got no money, and the debts just aren’t going away.”
If the second response is closer to your current situation than the first, you are in company with many, many families: at least half of all marriages and partnerships run aground in difficult circumstances.
Where do you turn for help?
If you are contemplating divorce, you might want to find a local solicitor. Alternatively, you could download the Divorce Petition and instructions on how to fill it in, and start the divorce yourself. But the divorce is simply the legal process which dissolves your marriage. What about the children and what about the financial side?
A mediator can help. Here at Focus Mediation, we offer an introductory meeting with an experienced, highly qualified lawyer-mediator who will listen to your story, and then describe how you go about preparing, negotiating and finalising a financial settlement. She will then invite your other half to a similar meeting, so that she has heard how things look for both of you: where are the problems, what are your fears, what do you hope to achieve? She can help you sort it out.
When you start the joint mediation sessions, and the mediator can help you work out a set of proposals which meets the needs of everyone and takes everything into account. If you need help with your shared parenting plan, she will offer a session on that as well.
Mediation is cheaper than using lawyers, quicker and less divisive.
With any luck, by the time you get to the next holidays, things will be looking up and be a bit more sorted.